Sunday, June 23, 2013

Spending enough time with God

Dear Heavenly Father,

I am sorry that I have not spent time with You lately.  I wish I could turn back and spend time with You.  I have allowed myself to be distracted by the things of this world.  I am sorry.  Forgive me for my sins. 

I have taken my time for granted.  Life is too short for that.  Life is also too short for taking pot shots at people and for being unkind and rather rude to others.  But I should not care about others, or should I?

I realize that there are people who are mean and nasty.  They need prayer and I will pray for them to resolve their differences and move on.  That is what I need to do.  I have an issue and it involves something petty.  I have not moved on and now I am afraid. 

I have allowed fear to take over.  The fear is not paralyzing but it could be.  I am scared so much of the time now.  I can't even walk in my own home unless there are eggshells there.  I cannot take this fear anymore.

Help me to renew my unsound mind.  How do I develop a mind that is sound?  I wonder if it is more difficult being that I am bipolar.  It is a lot of work having this disorder with the mood swings, the sometimes sleepless nights, and the obsessive thoughts.  I am very vulnerable to attacks and to fears that I have.  Anything can be a trigger to an obsessive thoughts.  As a result, my world is getting smaller.  Help me to make the first move to overcome this vulnerability.  I am surprised at the way that I have managed to avoid so much yet thrived at the same time. 

As You already well know, I hate avoidance.  I am not using the right motivation to just decide on my entertainment choices.  I realize that I spend too much time entertaining myself and not enough time with You.  I am also sorry for that.  Help me to spend my days living for You and serving You and not myself.  Help me to cast out all vain imaginations and to pull down strongholds.  How do I go about doing that?  Where do I begin?  How do I start doing those things?

In Jesus' Name,