Tuesday, June 11, 2013

More, More, More

Dear God,

One of my favorite songs is "More, More, More" by Joann Rosario. I have a question. What does it mean to want more of You? Does it mean necesarily to ask for the Holy Spirit for His guidance? I honestly do not know what it means. I feel silly for asking You this. I do want more of You. I want to know You even more.

Thank You for saving me. You are my Lord and Savior. I repent of my sins for I have felt that I am not ready for Your return, but I wonder if that is about doubt or reality. I am a sinner and I need You always. I am dependent and have become more dependent on You.

It seems like I am rambling on, but I want to know You more. I ask You for wisdom, guidance, and direction. That is something that I had doubts about. It feels like sometimes that I have not gotten wiser and I am still stuck in the same place. I feel so alone and overwhelmed.

I have finally learned that the key to no longer being overwhelmed is my no longer taking control because I end up losing control. I give You total and complete control over every detail of my life and my affairs. The thoughts I have overwhelmed me. I have been in need to lose weight, but need must be coupled with want in this case. My desire is to lose weight. The truth is, not only do I need to lose weight, I want to lose weight.

I am the kind of person who seemingly expects things to be hard. It is great when things are so easy, but challenging myself can be a big frustration. Losing weight is a big challenge but I know the results are well worth it. I realize that I had to change my mindset in order for things to be manageable. I needed to change. I have also come to realize that in order to change, I had to make changes. Be proactive. I had to relax and take my time.

I had to be realistic about things. I was overwhelmed. I was in dire need of relaxation. I am glad that I am feeling better about things. I realize that tomorrow has its own sufficient evil thereof. All I had to do was take my time and live life day by day. I had to learn from my mistakes, which are many. I do wish I had learned them earlier, but I cannot go back. I am glad that all is well so far. 

Letters to God