Male v Female dynamic

Dear God,

I just wanted to know why I am obsessed with the male and female dynamic?  Why am I obsessed and have compulsions about cheating?  It really makes no sense to me.  I wish sometimes that I can think on other things.  It seems really silly but I wonder if could obsess over cars, money, or getting thinner.  Realistically, however, it would be a bad thing.  Obsessing over anything would make life difficult for me.  Being fearful and having obsessive thoughts is torturous.  I hate the torture and the seeming addiction that I have to know everything.

I have strong views on things and sometimes those things bother me.  I wonder sometimes if they are my own convictions and opinions.  I sometimes wonder if they are really the thoughts.  I do believe that they can be a mix of my own convictions and what the thoughts say to me.  For instance, I have my own views on a woman posing nude.  My views are I guess it depends on the situation.  If a woman poses nude for artistic reasons, then I don't see anything wrong with it.  However, if a woman poses nude for a men's magazine, then the thoughts say that I should question her morality.

I do think that there is a double standard because a woman's character and morals are questioned.  I think this is wrong.  I personally feel that she has the conscious choice to pose nude.  However, a woman's nude body should be for her husband and her husband only.  I see it from a Christian point of view.  Posing nude or even half naked for a mens magazine can lead to problems such as stigma, double standards, and exposing married men to commit adultery in his heart.  I cannot say that she is demeaning herself, but there is an issue of having the stigma that she lacks decency and morality and yet that is not fair.  A man looking at a nude or half nude woman in a mens magazine could be objectifying her and hopefully, when a woman decides to pose, she should take that into account.  On the other hand, men can be objectified as well, if we are to look at this from that point of view.  There are women who look unto a man in the sex industry or who poses without his shirt on as a sex object.  There are some women who are lecherous, simple, and lack morality and decency as well.  Why isn't she criticized for looking at a man in that way?

I guess what I am trying to say is that I wonder if my way of thinking about this is wrong.  Is it sinful to have obsessive thoughts about this because it is not a Christian way of thinking?  What should be my thoughts on the sex industry and on posing nude?  How should I pray for men and women who either pose nude or in the sex industry? Is it an issue of lacking in dignity and morals?  Or is it something else?  I think the issue with me is me.  I am not in the sex industry and I have never posed nude.  Why should the opinions of others matter to me?  Why do I care what others think?  What is wrong with me?  Why is my mind so screwed up?  Why can't I think on things and be transformed by the renewing of my mind and forming my own opinions?  Those are things that I need to have answered.

Sincerely,


Letters to God