OCD

Dear Heavenly Father,

Thank You .  You have answered my prayers.  Thank You.  You have saved me.  Thank You, Lord, for Your mercy endures forever.

It took me a while to understand and discover this.  I realize that it has been a while since I have read Your word.  It is making me anxious and I know why.  The woman in this case is rather promiscuous and promiscuous women make me nervous.  How should I see a promiscuous woman, especially if she is married?  How should I see a promiscuous man, especially if he is married?

What is wrong with me?  How can I see the eternal when the temporary is so strong?  Why do I have obsessive compulsive disorder period?  I admit that spiritually it is a blessing but other than that, it has been anything but a blessing.  I wish all of this insight could help me sometimes.  I guess all I can do is remember that these thoughts are about over-concerning myself with the worst case scenario.

What is the worst case scenario?  The worst thing I can think of is that a promiscuous wife who is uncaring, unfeeling, and just a bad all-around person.  She may have married for love or may not have but I realize that women in my worst case scenario are in the minority.  What is wrong with me, Lord?  Why me, Lord?  I am not in a relationship.  I have never been in a relationship so I never cheated.  I am not even worried about someone cheating on me.  So why do I have these particular thoughts?  I guess it is part of the disorder where there is uncertainty.  I have been trying to figure that out quite a bit for the last seven years and the truth is, I will never know the exact answer.

How do I truly approach these obsessive thoughts?  How do I apply Your word to these obsessive thoughts?  Do I stand in agreement with the OCD Persona?  Is the persona a principality or a figment of my imagination?  Where do I begin from here?  How do I become healed of having OCD?  How do I keep from ruminating and asking questions?  How do I focus on what is real and true and pure in the midst of obsessive thoughts while living in a sinful world?

Sincerely,


Letters to God