Thursday, May 14, 2015

My rant and prayer

Dear Heavenly Father,

I pray that all will be well in the house.  So far, I ask and pray for healing, physically, spiritually, and emotionally. Give me clarity on the situation at hand.  I need to know that my eyes can be and will be opened to what is really going on.  I have no idea how to change things around here.  I feel trapped and alone sometimes.  There is something wrong in this house.  There is no real life or laughter among the four of us here.  I have no idea what to think, feel, do, or even say about this situation.  Lord, help us.  Do a mighty work in our lives and in this home.  I have not been happy here yet I am happy here.  Things have gotten so anxiety-ridden for me, that I love isolating myself and taking myself out of the situation.  However, I realize that I do need to go out more.  I have no way to leave.  I don't have enough credit, income, references, or even transportation.  I personally am stuck in the situation I am in.  I feel as though the world has left me behind.  I have prayed about this often.

Lord, I don't know what to do.  I ask that You would come through for me.  I would like to change things but I don't know how.  I would like to say and do what I want to say, but where do I begin?  There is no real peace in this home despite how peaceful it may seem to much of the outside world.  I feel like I am being taken advantage of.  I am just tired.  I know that this is not all about me, but I am writing You this because I am just telling You how I really feel about the situation.  It has been too long.  I have no real time to truly be alone.  There is a growing sense of fear and anxiety that is made worse by the lack that is going on here.  The root of the problem has been around for years and it seems that it would never end.  I am praying and making a petition to You: change it.  Change us.  Change the situation at hand.  I need You to answer me.  I need immediate assistance in this manner.  Too much has gone wrong despite how we seem to get along, I know something is wrong.  Lord, help us.

I thank You for answering this prayer.

In Jesus' name,