Wednesday, July 17, 2013

Obsession with an actor

Dear God,

So far, all is well.  I feel like there is something that I need to do.  I am still having to deal with the obsession with this actor.  I want the images of this actor erased from my mind.  I am bipolar with OCD symptoms.  I can allow it to get too far which is what I don't want.  I am saddened that I am even afraid to mention his name even though I have no need to fear.  He has done nothing to me.  I am trying to move on which isn't easy.  I am committing idolatry and I am so sorry.  I repent of my sins and I want more than anything to move on and move forward.  This actor is quite talented yes, but he is a human, a sinful human being just like the rest of us.  He is in need of You, Lord, and I prayed for him.

I realize that it doesn't matter when it happened, why it is happening, and who he is.
My obsession is just obsession.  I want to get rid of this obsession.  Take this off of my mind.  I want to move forward and do things that are good for me.  I want to learn things.  I want to expand my social circle.  There is so much that I don't want to do.  Where do I begin?  Guide me, Lord with Your eye.  Help me to see that there is so much for me to do and that I have so much to offer.  Open doors for me so that I can serve You better.

This obsession with this actor is a sign that there is something missing in my life.  I am missing a social life.  I don't have any transportation so I cannot just go and come as I play.  That has been an issue of mine for a while now.  I need help in this area and I know that You are bigger than all of my issues.  Lord, I ask that You do a mighty work in my life.  Where do I begin?  I need to tear down strongholds which means that I have to end this idolatrous fascination with this man.  He is an image and another human and that is how I have to see it.  It would be hard, but at the same time, with a little work, it will be easier.  I am thankful that with You, all things are possible.


Letters to God