Saturday, October 5, 2013

MR and CO

Dear God,

Thank You.  I have been having obsessive thoughts with Mickey Rourke and his ex-wife Carre Otis.  You see, Carre wrote a book about her life which chronicles even her marriage to Mickey Rourke.  I  have read about those two and even I find the time suspect.  I don't wish to end up not liking her because of a book she wrote.  I don't know her nor have I met her.  I'm sure she is a nice person since I haven't read the book and I don't know her.  The truth is, the OCD wants me to not like her because of what I read from other people and because I am a "fan" of Mickey Rourke.

Mickey Rourke was gorgeous back in the day.  It is sad that he had so much surgery that he looks so different.  It is as if he is two different people.  I even have lustful thoughts about him.  I wonder what it would be like to be a friend or girlfriend of his.  Notice I never said wife.  If he was as bad as Carre said he was, then I am glad to have never have the thoughts about him.  I wish the thoughts and obsession about him would go away.  I am putting these thoughts in proper perspective.

I am obsessed with this man to the point where I am doing searches of him and his pics.  I even liked some of his pics and pages on Facebook. I really don't like that I am doing this.  I always give in to temptation, the temptation to do the things that I know not to do and to do the things that don't make any sense.  It seems as if I am obsessed and no longer have an adult crush on him.  It seemed harmless at first but I realize that it isn't.

Maybe I was being shallow.  Mickey isn't conventionally good-looking but he seems to have qualities that appeals to me, not to mention that he is fit.  He is a good actor and I like his voice.  Now if only I can see him for who he is and what he is like.  I will pray for Mickey and Carre.  I am not sure but I think that Mickey is Catholic and Carre is Buddhist.  Anyways, I don't know what kind of people they really are.  I watched at least four of his movies in the past few months and I would obsess if I miss a movie with him in it. 

He was so cute in Diner.  He was sexy in "Iron Man 2".  He was cool in the Expendables as I loved his voice.  I am exposing myself to You this way because You already know and because I want to see what these thoughts are all about.  I need to relax my mind for I know that with a mind that is not calm, the thoughts are given more power to lack some better words.  Father, help me see life past these thoughts.  I pray that Carre and Mickey both find you, Lord, and that they receive You as Savior and Lord.  Carre came a long way and so did Mickey and they should thank You for their blessings, not whoever Catholics and Buddhists give credit to.

Help me to see things  and people as they really are.  I don't wish to explain, justify, or whatever what I should not do to rationalize my thoughts.  Heal me of those thoughts and may my obsessions no longer bother me.  I don't wish to just manage my thoughts anymore, for they can be annoying like a swarm of flies.  They used to sting like a swarm of bees, but I am learning to understand and see how silly they are.  Help me to see them as they really are, images, and flawed human beings, warts and all.  Carre was a drug addict and Mickey is a plastic surgery addict who smokes like a chimney. 

There is a part of me that is attracted to him and a part of me that feels sorry for him.  Help me to see them as You see them.  Thank You for all that You have done for me and I ask You for forgiveness, Lord as I have committed idolatry and lust and selfishness.  Thank You for taking care of me.  Help me to focus on You and the things of God, especially during times of weakness.  Show Yourself strong during those times, especially during those times, Lord.

In Jesus' Name,

Amen

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