Dear God,
Yesterday I wrote about Mickey Rourke and his ex-wife Carre Otis. My "feelings" toward her are not true feelings but what the obsession says I should feel. It is wrong and for that, I apologize to You and to myself.
I also wrote about Mickey and I wonder if it is time for me to tell someone else, like my mother. I just want to know how to go about doing so. I have an obsession with Mickey Rourke that just won't go away, even in my dreams.
I have tried to let it go, but to no avail. Help me in this matter, Lord. I feel like a failure for not working hard enough or for not resisting temptation enough. I am confused in my feelings about him. One minute I hate having this obsession. And the next minute, I just love it because it takes time away from any other obsessive thought that I may have.
I am just a wreck. Does my obsession with Mickey Rourke take time away from You? Is it idolatry if I am obsessed? I no longer have a crush on Mickey Rourke, but it is an obsession. I feel like I am going crazy and my obsession is taking me places where I don't want to go.
I feel like I want to be friends with him. I am even obsessed with one of his other friends and co-stars, especially from the Expendables. It has become one of my favorite movies. I just love that movie, but I believe that maybe I shouldn't watch it too much. Mickey is just a gorgeous and sexy man to me, depending on what he is wearing or not wearing. Oops.
How do I overcome this lust with Mickey Rourke? I have a habit of being obsessed and stalking men I find attractive. I wish I had a real relationship with someone I can call my own. However, how do I strike up a conversation with someone when I have no place to go? I feel lonely sometimes and I admit that I do need someone to talk to.
Forgive me for my sins. I have been struggling with lust for quite some time now and I need help. I have been in a struggle to stop, but I always give in. I need Your strength to overcome temptation. What should I do and how should I go about it? I need Your help, obvious help for my obsession. I have been obsessed with others for years and I am concerned that I will have another one I have a hard time controlling. I wish that it was easy, but it is not. Help me to be wise and stand strong in this. Maybe I am approaching it all wrong. However, I need guidance in my life. I pray for guidance.
Guide me with Your eye, Lord. Help me to see Mickey as You see him. Mickey is not You at all and I hope that I don't see him as such. However, I do have lustful thoughts about him and I would like to know what it would be like to sleep with someone. I am a virgin after all. How do I begin a new chapter in my life? I want to be healthier, happier, and whole. Lord, guide me in that direction. Thy will be done.
Sincerely,
Letters to God
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